Adventures In Spring Cleaning: How To Clean Out Your Closet with a Vengeance!

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It’s Springtime in Brooklyn.  And the sheer fact that it’s above 10 degrees and the snow is mostly off the ground, makes me want to clean out my closet, get rid of all of my bulky coats and run half naked through the streets.

I can’t help you get half naked,
but I can help you clean out your closet.

I spent all day going back and forth between closet cleaning and doing taxes.
I know how to party.
If you haven’t read my fun closet attacking tips before….well, now is the perfect time!

1.  This is a job to be done with one of my favorite drugs…. Music.   So, please, hit play on my very first 8 track mix (thanks for the tip, Gala Darling!) and enjoy the random picture of me passed out under clothing racks taken by Burke Heffner.

I’m not explaining it.

2.  Speed Sort – It’s like Speed Dating Your Closet.   Grab the first item in your closet and in a two-second gut reaction proceed to throw clothing item in question into one of three piles on your bed:  “Yes”, “Maybe” or “Hell No”.

    • “Yes” pile:  if you love wearing it, it fits you right and makes you happy.
    • “Maybe” pile: if it’s been sitting there with no action from you for six months or more.
    • “Hell No” pile: if you bought it, brought it home, felt guilty, and kept it there because you felt bad about buying it.  It’s clothing.  It doesn’t have feelings.  Ditch it.

3. Rejoice in the Void.  Oh, you Saintly Thing.  Empty closet of cleanliness.  Ignore “Maybe” and “Hell No” and just say “Yes”.  Carefully put all the absolute 100% “Yes” pile on your bed – back on the rack.  Notice how cute your closet looks.  Notice how much room you just made for more 100% future YES clothes to join their friends here.  They would get along nicely.  Closet Fairy Godmother swoops in and allows you to pick 3 of your favorite things from the “Maybe” pile.  It is a struggle.  But you listen to her, for she is wise.

4. Release The Rest of Your Treasures into the Wild.   Donate, swap clothes with friends, or get your other friends to all do this together and team up to throw the clothing party of the CENTURY.  You can also turn those treasures into $$ and sell them on Etsy or Ebay. This Friday, I’m going to be listing a bunch of things on Ebay that are awesome and ready to go to a new home.  I’m getting a new fire number act together, and that shit ain’t cheap.  So I’ll be selling off beautiful things like this headpiece:

So Lovely Dangers….tell me about your closet clearing tips.
What would be in your wild clothes flinging music mix?
Have you held clothing swaps or parties?
Or share a picture of one of your favorite snags from a friend’s closet or party…..

I snagged this faux fur cream coat from my neighbor, Lucille, who told me stories of rocking it out in the 60s before she passed it along to me.  It has been in the gutter with me and all over the world on a tour bus….and of course, chillin’ with my lovely artist friend, Miss Zelda Devon.


Can’t wait to share style stories with you!