Flirt Alert! How To Flirt – 3 Tips From A Burlesque Performer.

For the past 8 years, I’ve made a living as a professional burlesque performer.
Flirting is a job skill, my friends.

I have always enjoyed looking at human interaction….
seeing what brings us closer,
watching for signs communicated by body language.

There are so many different ways that we speak to each other.

The following 3 tips are just a few of the things that I’ve noticed about flirting.
The things that I do aren’t manipulative or planned…
these are just things that I’ve noticed that I do,
or I have noticed others doing when I am drawn to them.

Wanna learn with me?
I’m doing 4 in-person Sensuality and Seduction classes in NYC, starting Thursday, March 26th
and I’m doing two international online classes starting Sunday, March 29th!


Let’s play!

Flirt Tip #1: My Hook and Release Technique.
This is something that I noticed when watching other people having an intimate conversation. It naturally occurs – and I started to notice myself doing it when talking to people that I felt truly comfortable with.

This tip is all about voice levels and body language.

After having a normal tone conversation with your crush,
lean in with your body and talk in a hushed tone,
this will naturally cause your crush to lean in closer to you to hear the secret.

After a few moments of that,
push your body back into the chair as far away from your crush as possible,
take up room with your body (drape your arms over back of chair, etc)
and continue the story in a louder voice
as if you have control of the whole room.

I’ve witnessed this happen naturally with people who are really good with “working a room”.
It is fascinating to watch a crowd of people gather around one person and all lean in intimately as the person speaks in a softer, hushed tone.
Then, as the person leans back and pulls the “punch line” or end of a story in a louder voice, I have watched the crowd also mimic and lean back….taking this person in fully.

This works like a charm one-on-one.

Flirt Tip #2: The Melting Look (or Look/Look Away/Look Technique)
This is something I do naturally on stage ALL THE TIME.
And since I’m aware of it, I notice that people that flirt do it constantly.

Look at your crush right in the eyes.
Then take a moment to look towards the floor and let your crush visually “take you in” without you looking at them.
Take this moment to look down and tuck your hair behind your ear, fix your stocking, or have a sip of your drink….
Then with your head still tilted down,
glanceĀ up to your crush and hold a solid gaze for 5 seconds.


Flirt Tip #3: The Presidential. (The Slow Down)
I call this technique of mine The Presidential, because I’ve noticed that most presidents do this.
I am hypnotized by voice.
It’s no surprise that some of my best friends and the people closest to me are singers/musicians.
In New York City, where I live, I notice that people generally speak rapidly to keep up with one another.
In the past couple of years, as technology gets faster, our attention spans decrease, and I’ve noticed when even going home to a more relaxed place like Florida, people seem to talk faster than they used to.
Watch a clip of the President speaking….
You will notice that he speaks
slowly and clearly
so that people from all over the world can understand.
It is hypnotizing and powerful.
If you want to really draw your crush into you…
speak slowly, deliberately and with power.
It’s so different from what we are used to,
your crush will take notice and be drawn in.

PS. This is also a great way to train yourself out of “like” and “um” in your speaking….
it has absolutely worked for me.

See you in class!

Are you flirting with me?

What are your favorite ways to flirt?
What has worked for you? What has worked ON you?
Share with me in the comments!
Do you want to write a love letter to your crush? I’ve got the secrets here!

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