How To Be Magnetic: 4 Ways To Rev Up Your Magnetism.

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I spent an hour curled up in the little garden, my magical Macbook Air friend sitting on a wooden step in front of me, broadcasting my first online Sensuality and Seduction class to the world.

Myself and 50 kickass women, from as far as Australia to my familiar streets of New York City, spent 60 gorgeous minutes igniting our imaginations, creating  our “seduction stories”, laughing and sharing secrets about the importance of body language and signature scents.

And now, as night falls, and I sit in a candlelit cafe tucked in the mountains, I was thinking about what we talked about today and I was thinking about what TRUE MAGNETISM means.

My brain whirled with these questions:

 What is True Magnetism?

♥  What is that wild magnet in our souls that draws us to each other?

♥  How do we cultivate that magnetic pull?

Less than a month ago, my forehead against some East Village bar, listening to some sad songs on a jukebox, I sighed to my dear friend, Jaye, “I think I lost my magnet.”

Fast forward to a mere 21 days later, Spring approaching on the edges of New York City, bringing longer days and warmer nights….my magnet feels charged, pulling the good things to me once again.

But how do you re-charge an inner magnet?  And what the fuck is this magnet anyway?

The magnet is the truest reflection of you.

For example, I was talking to my friend, Desiree, the other night, who is a writer and storyteller, and who just won a major story slam.  She was glowing as I was asking her questions about it, and her friend jumped in and said….. “She’s been on FIRE lately.”

Your magnet is your fire.

If you’re feeling like you’ve lost your magnet lately, here’s my tips on how to find it again and get that fucker working.

♥  Throw Yourself Into Some Serious Self Care.  

Yes.  I know.  If you’re feeling like you’ve lost your magnet, you might be in the head-under-the-covers-maybe-I’ll-just-watch-Netflix-some-more stage.  Just doing something simple, like dragging yourself out and searching for a “Signature Scent” for Spring might whip you back into shape.
Now.  I can see you shake your head at me right now.  “Veronica, what in the hell does going to get some perfume or oils have to do with this?”
My love.  My sweet darling.  It has everything to do with it.  Smell triggers gorgeous emotions in us, and not only that scent is our biggest connector to memory.  To start fresh and find your magnet again, what kind of scent is going to be your “fantasy” of you?

I personally dig fresh pressed from the peel orange oil and I fiend over dark sensual scents like Gucci Rush and Obsession.  What’s your signature scent favorites?

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♥  Do Something That You Are Wildly Passionate About For 30 Minutes Today and Get A Text Partner.

In the midst of my lost magnet, Bastard Keith (Burlesque MC/Singer/Writer) and I started an hour long writing session project.  Basically, we would choose an hour during the day, and five minutes before he would text me to get ready.  At that point, I shut off my internet, open my pages document and let my fingers fly for an hour.  For some reason, knowing that he was somewhere in Brooklyn doing the same thing, kept me on task.  Trust me, those thoughts like – hey- the-dog-probably-needs-to-go-for-a-walk-right-now or, damn,-I’m-feeling-hungry-maybe-I’ll-just-go-grab-some-lunch definitely came up, but I shoved them down because at the end of that hour, Bastard Keith is going to be texting me how I did, and I want to kick ass.

This mini-accomplishment of working creativity on my writing helps me feel good about myself and charges up that magnet.

♥  Do Something That Is Good For You For About For 30 Minutes Today and Get A Text Partner.

Notice I didn’t say “wildly passionate about”, but “good for you”.  I’m talking about the shit that you do now, that a month from now Future You will be psyched that you did.   My friend, Kristi Klein and I work out and then text each other pictures afterwards.  When I see her picture come through on my phone, it motivates me to get my ass moving.  By the end of it, I feel great, like I did something right, and then I send stupid pictures like this.  You know, pictures that you never needed to see, that I don’t know why the hell I’m posting publicly:

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♥  Go Out Dressed Up as Fantasy You.

The winter up in the old New York City has been dragging.  It snowed the first day of Spring.  And if I have to look at anything resembling a winter coat or clothes, I want to just rip it to shreds.

Last week, when the morning was filled with rain and clouds and I could feel the weather creeping into my mood, I fought back with dress up.  I had ALOT to do.  I planned on bringing my computer to a local cafe to work and I decided I was going to dress up to make myself feel better .  I warmed up my hot curlers, pulled on my nude silk stockings, listened to my “Voodoo Playlist” while I streaked on my black liquid cateye, slipped into a 1940s chocolate brown and pink dress, and stepped out the door in my t-strap mary jane shoes.  I felt like a wild world dominating femme fatale and at that coffee house, my fingers tapped that keyboard a million miles an hour, getting my stuff done and being a boss.

Go-Go Magnet Power!

What helps you rev up your magnet?

If you loved this post, please SHARE IT.  I think that’s sexy!

Wanna learn more with me?  Well I’m teaching LIVE in NYC this month and on the ol’ internets……

Love it? Share it.

How To Write the Sexiest, Most Passionate Love Letter Ever…to Yourself.

I have penned flowing cursive with luscious words to people that I’ve been madly in love with, to people I’ve had wild inspiration crushes on, to people who have adventured with me in gutters all over the world as my dear friends….
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I have pressed the pen to paper in a hot, frenzy of utter adoration.
I have pressed my lip prints to some leaving a trace of me behind.
I have folded these notes into eighths like a schoolgirl and slid them under doors, into suitcases, into my perfumed envelopes and I have pressed them into palms.

Love letter writing is my art. Seduction and words, my paint. The kiss prints, the perfume spritz, the folding and sealing, the secret delivery of them….my drugs.

I have passionately bitten the corners of love letters leaving my teeth marks upon them.
I have poured drops of my morning nutmeg sprinkled lattes on them when I’m half way across the world from my Lover.
I have pouted and pressed my blood red lipstick kisses on them.
I have seared their corners with the flames of magic candles that I made with my own hands.
I have smeared their ink with drops of my tears.
I have licked the name of the person I wrote it to….to hold the letters of their name in my mouth a little bit longer….

The wandering moments when writing can become a wild fetish.
Scrawled black ink staining a perfect cream page.
Knowing the Recipient’s fingers will trace the same folds that my hands made in the paper.
Knowing that eyes will take in all the loops and curves of my hand-writing…the magics of my meaning.

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A note to my Lover even survived our house fire. Proof that it’s hotter than fire itself.

 

Confession: I have written these notes for years. But it was only 3 years ago, when I turned that pen on myself.

Perhaps it was long overdue.

I got out my favorite cream colored paper and spritzed my red bottle of Gucci Rush on it. I waved it in the air to dry, like I’ve done a million times before. Waiting to be inspired by the sultry scent of it.

And then I pressed my pen to the paper and was…..
lost.

Where to begin? It felt stupid maybe. Trite. A love letter to myself. Why bother?

But as one of my heroes, Ru Paul, loves to say: “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love somebody else?….

Can I get an amen?

Even though it felt silly, I made myself do it that first time. And when I was done, I felt exhilarated. There, in my own hand, in permanent ink, were praises I sang to myself for the first time, were things I was proud of, were things I thought made me the most unique.

I loved this exercise.
I made Andrea Martin do it on international television on MTV’s MADE with me.
I make the women who come to my workshops do it.
I’ve made my friends do it.

Bonus Points: Share your love letter with someone you trust. They will always add things that you have forgotten or incredible things you just don’t see about yourself.

How do you even begin?

1. Get beautiful paper to write on and a perfect pen. Lately I’ve been using an antique cream 30lb paper for my letters and a deep purple ink pen.

2. Spritz your scent on the paper before you write (so it doesn’t smear the ink afterwards). Fan the paper back and forth in your face, and close your eyes to take in the scent. Let it inspire you.

3. Step back and think about what you love about yourself. What makes you YOU? What makes you unique, interesting, sizzling, different, awesome, lovely, adventurous, passionate? Even though it feels silly, write it down. You know the stories from people who have died and come back to life…when they say that when they are leaving their body, it is only at that moment that they realize how amazing they were? It is only at that moment that they felt love for this being that they were on earth for that period of time.

Well this is your time, Baby. This is your body. This is your life. And this is your letter to celebrate it.

If you are getting stuck, you should absolutely check out this brilliant post which includes a love letter that sassy seductress, Kitty Cavalier wrote and shared in one my classes. When she read it out loud, everyone in class sighed with appreciation. It was gorgeous and liberating.

Would you like to be really brave? Share 4 lines of a love letter to yourself in the comments below. One random person will win a love letter (sent via snail mail) from me. AND if you would like to be enchanted further…. I will be teaching my very first workshop of 2013 on March 23rd in NYC – the Journey of Seduction at Kitty’s School of Charm and Cheek. Because I’ve slated 2013 to work on my film and my book proposal – teaching will be a rare treat. I hope you can join me…this is what happened last time and it was hot.

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Can’t wait to read snippets of your love letters…

The Things That Make Us Tick.

Because I like to tease…..come take a peek inside my Fortune Telling Parlour at our magic apartment in Brooklyn.

I’m sitting here with a cappuccino and my journal. I had the urge to reach out to you and have a conversation here. I want to hear what you have to say, too. I read all your comments on these and the thoughts you post. So let’s take a moment in this virtual space together. This is what I’m looking at right now. Pull up a seat…

I should probably warn you, I’m not a talk-about-the-weather kind of girl. If you read this blog, you probably got that already. So if we’re talking, I wanna know what you’re really about.

I wanna know what makes you happy, what pisses you off, what your favorite life memories are, what your wildest dreams are…

I want to know what you have learned in this life so far.

We are all teachers.

Let me ask you this:

“If you were to teach something…. what would it be about? What is your thing?

Think about it. Write your answer in the comments. Let’s dialogue with this.

If I were to ask you – what three words would you use to describe what makes you tick….what would they be?

Mine would be: Magic. Performing. Sacred Seduction.  (I know.  That’s four.  Fuck it.)

This is a picture of a love spell that Burke Heffner and I did together on a cast iron balcony of a haunted hotel in the French Quarter of New Orleans.

I was raised with magic.

It is in my bones, in my blood, it’s in everything I do.

It’s how I carry on the legacy of my ancestors. It is what they left for me.

It is part of their story that they left for me to continue…..


This is on my altar. I made this years ago before I had ever stepped foot out of the country. I created it six months before I ever went on tour. This is the magic energy I put behind this Shrine of Destiny:

  • My confidence was not high, so I needed to see myself in the middle of it being strong.  I decorated myself with glued on crystals so that they would sparkle when I was burning my candle in front of it.
  • There is a picture of me as a happy little kid making muscles below it.  The Me of the Past is a current inspiration.  She is vibrant, happy and strong.  In this shrine, she is the “foundation” of the future success.
  • The butterflies around my head are the spirits and guardians who watch over me.  They are with me on the journey.  In the full shrine, I have pictures of dear relatives, friends, and animal companions who have passed on pasted next to colorful butterflies (for transformation).
  • I put landmarks of the world around me as I was aching to get out of the country for the first time and travel.  Six months after making this, I started touring with Emilie and I am happy to report that I have seen many of those landmarks in person.

What would you put in your Shrine of Destiny?

How do you want to write your life?

I have been writing my book proposal surrounding all of these subjects – magic, passion, confidence.  It’s a book I’m forming to tell stories in, to pass on the magic of my ancestors.  It is a project that I’m pretty damn passionate about.

It is the bones of it all….

Many of the things I am writing about, I will be doing in person in my workshops this Fall.

Side by side, next to you.  Showing you the magic just like my Grandma Helen showed me.

With my upcoming schedule of touring and then Kickstarting our beloved Revolver on March 4th, 2013 and then shooting it the Summer of 2013, it’s probably going to be awhile before I am holding classes again.  I’m grateful to have a chance to do it now, in this perfect Autumn magic time, because it’s something that brings me so much joy.

It’s the creation of a circle.  A tribe.  It is where all of the wild things are….

One week from now, the Luminous Wild Retreat begins in Upstate NY.  If you live near NYC and you want to join my New York City circle on Tuesday nights – my first Fall NYC workshop will be Love Potion No 9. on October 16th.  You can read about the Tuesday NYC Circles and Luminous Wild here.

I will also be teaching Spellbinding Burlesque at the School of Burlesque on November 3rd.  If you want to shimmy with magic – click here. 

I hope to see you in person if possible – to work our unique brands of magic together.

I want this space that we have here in this little cozy corner of the internet to be a place for discussion.  A place for learning, for creating, for growing, for bouncing ideas off each other, for whispering big, beautiful dreams into each other’s ears and making them realities.  Do you have questions for me?

I’m listening.